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【TOP 50】Robin Williams Quotes - WhatsApp Status | Page-1

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See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time. - Robin Williams Quotes

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

American Comedian Funny

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say

In England, if you commit a crime, the police don't have a gun and you don't have a gun. If you commit a crime, the police will say "Stop, or I'll say stop again."

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet. - Robin Williams Quotes

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it. - Robin Williams Quotes

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

American Comedian Funny Madness Quote of the Day

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs. - Robin Williams Quotes

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

American Comedian Drugs Funny

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture. - Robin Williams Quotes

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

American Comedian Comedy Funny Quote of the Day

What is a stealth bomber? It's a bomber that doesn't show up on radar, and you can't see it. Then we don't need one. - Robin Williams Quotes

What is a stealth bomber? It's a bomber that doesn't show up on radar, and you can't see it. Then we don't need one.

There are so many beautiful parts of the world . . . Thailand, Italy, the south of France. There are places in Spain that are astonishing. But here . . . 25 miles and you go up on Mount Tam to see the fog come in; 25 miles the other direction and you're somewhere else that takes your breath away. There's no question this is where I want to live. Never has been. - Robin Williams Quotes

There are so many beautiful parts of the world . . . Thailand, Italy, the south of France. There are places in Spain that are astonishing. But here . . . 25 miles and you go up on Mount Tam to see the fog come in; 25 miles the other direction and you're somewhere else that takes your breath away. There's no question this is where I want to live. Never has been.

I've actually gone to the zoo and had monkeys shout to me from their cages,

I've actually gone to the zoo and had monkeys shout to me from their cages, "I'm in here when you're walking around like that?"

Cricket is basically baseball on valium. - Robin Williams Quotes

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

American Comedian Baseball Famous Baseball Funny Sports

Carpe per diem-seize the check. - Robin Williams Quotes

Carpe per diem-seize the check.

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves? - Robin Williams Quotes

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

American Comedian Funny Quote of the Day

Men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are. - Robin Williams Quotes

Men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.

[Before opening an envelope for best supporting actress] I feel like Adam when he said to Eve, `Back up, I don't know how big this gets. - Robin Williams Quotes

[Before opening an envelope for best supporting actress] I feel like Adam when he said to Eve, `Back up, I don't know how big this gets.

When the Williams sisters play tennis, it gets pretty hot. When they start grunting, I'm in. - Robin Williams Quotes

When the Williams sisters play tennis, it gets pretty hot. When they start grunting, I'm in.

We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion.And medicine, law, business, engineering - these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for. - Robin Williams Quotes

We don't read and write poetry because it's cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion.And medicine, law, business, engineering - these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for.

Cute

It has this scope that's outrageous, but yet at the core, these very intimate scenes, so that alone is interesting. - Robin Williams Quotes

It has this scope that's outrageous, but yet at the core, these very intimate scenes, so that alone is interesting.

The only people flying to Europe will be terrorists, so it will be,

The only people flying to Europe will be terrorists, so it will be, "Will you be sitting in armed or unarmed?"

We're dealing with fundamentalists... the Amish are fundamentalists, but they don't try and hijack a carriage at needlepoint. And, if you're ever in Amish country and you see a man with his hand buried in a horse's ass, that's a mechanic. Remember that. - Robin Williams Quotes

We're dealing with fundamentalists... the Amish are fundamentalists, but they don't try and hijack a carriage at needlepoint. And, if you're ever in Amish country and you see a man with his hand buried in a horse's ass, that's a mechanic. Remember that.

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money. - Robin Williams Quotes

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.

American Comedian Funny Money

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams Quotes

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House.

American Comedian Funny Living

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying,

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, "Give me your poor, your tired, your huddled masses." She's got a baseball bat and yelling, "You want a piece of me?"

We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities. - Robin Williams Quotes

We Americans, we're a simple people . . . but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.

Mickey Mouse to a three-year-old is a six-foot-tall RAT! - Robin Williams Quotes

Mickey Mouse to a three-year-old is a six-foot-tall RAT!

It felt wonderful doing it. But that's rather like urinating in brown velvet pants. It can feel wonderful, but no one will watch. - Robin Williams Quotes

It felt wonderful doing it. But that's rather like urinating in brown velvet pants. It can feel wonderful, but no one will watch.

[ÃÂ· Also on DVD: A two-disc] Fern Gully . . . The Last Rainforest, ... Pet Alien. - Robin Williams Quotes

[ÃÂ· Also on DVD: A two-disc] Fern Gully . . . The Last Rainforest, ... Pet Alien.

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number? - Robin Williams Quotes

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?

American Comedian Funny

I love running cross country....On a track, I feel like a hamster. - Robin Williams Quotes

I love running cross country....On a track, I feel like a hamster.

Steve was that little boy in 'Deliverance' who played the banjo, - Robin Williams Quotes

Steve was that little boy in 'Deliverance' who played the banjo,

No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world. - Robin Williams Quotes

No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.

American Comedian Funny

And then there was [Secretary of Defense Donald] Rumsfeld coming out and saying,

And then there was [Secretary of Defense Donald] Rumsfeld coming out and saying, "I don't know when. I don't know where. But something bad is going to happen." And everyone else is saying, "Wait a minute, are you working with Miss Cleo or something? What is this, the Central Intuitive Agency?" . . . And you have Bush, hearing about all the fighting over Kashmir, and saying, "What? It's just a sweater!"

After a while, you just kind of chill. It just becomes a whole different lifestyle and no one bothers you. - Robin Williams Quotes

After a while, you just kind of chill. It just becomes a whole different lifestyle and no one bothers you.

I had a lovely military flight, thank you. I love spiraling in -- nothing like that to make your colon go,

I had a lovely military flight, thank you. I love spiraling in -- nothing like that to make your colon go, "Fire in the hole!"

Love

Shakespeare said,

Shakespeare said, "Kill all the lawyers." There were no agents then.

If you masturbated with your left hand, would it be like being touched by a retarded person? - Robin Williams Quotes

If you masturbated with your left hand, would it be like being touched by a retarded person?

. . . when you have a great audience, you can just keep going and finding new things. - Robin Williams Quotes

. . . when you have a great audience, you can just keep going and finding new things.

And I love to ride my bike, which is great aerobics, but also just a great time for me to think, so it's like this terrific double bill. - Robin Williams Quotes

And I love to ride my bike, which is great aerobics, but also just a great time for me to think, so it's like this terrific double bill.

Comedy is acting out optimism. - Robin Williams Quotes

Comedy is acting out optimism.

Acting And Actors American Comedian Funny

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist. - Robin Williams Quotes

My religious background is that my mother is a Christian Dior Scientist.

Spring is nature's way of saying,

Spring is nature's way of saying, "Let's party!"

American Comedian Funny

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time. - Robin Williams Quotes

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.

American Comedian Funny God Quote of the Day

My God. We've had cloning in the South for years. It's called cousins. - Robin Williams Quotes

My God. We've had cloning in the South for years. It's called cousins.

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose. - Robin Williams Quotes

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.

American Comedian Funny

Do you think God gets stoned? I think so . . . look at the platypus. - Robin Williams Quotes

Do you think God gets stoned? I think so . . . look at the platypus.

God

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days. - Robin Williams Quotes

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

American Comedian Comedy Funny Quote of the Day

Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time... - Robin Williams Quotes

Ah...so many pedestrians, so little time...

I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you. - Robin Williams Quotes

I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.

American Comedian Funny

What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong. - Robin Williams Quotes

What's right is what's left if you do everything else wrong.

American Comedian Comedy Funny

The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery. - Robin Williams Quotes

The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.

American Comedian Funny

You'll notice that Bush never speaks when Cheiney is drinking water, check that shit out. - Robin Williams Quotes

You'll notice that Bush never speaks when Cheiney is drinking water, check that shit out.

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